I was officially hired as a second grade teacher in August, a week before school started. Excitement and nerves ran through my body like a drug. I was actually at my restaurant job, my new one. We were in a preshift meeting when I got the call. On the spot I quit, and ran to work to set up my room.
I walk in and there are three interns from other classes there to help. Everyone is looking to me for answers. “Where would you like these, where is your desk going to be?” All I wanted to do was ask them, or tell them, “I have no idea what I’m doing, help me.”
It was scary if not anything else. However, I got through it. The next hurdle…meet the teacher on Monday. Hmm…I’m the teacher. What will I say? Am I going to look confident enough? Sweet but strict? Ahh...all these thoughts raced through my head. Again, I got through it. I also got through my first child tantrum, first referral, first lost tooth, first scrape, first cry, first difficult and challenging question, first embarrassing moment in front of the class, first field trip, first observation. I made it through it all. I am amazed at how much I have learned, and how much I continue to learn. These kids have taught me so much about myself, and about the teacher I want to be.
It wasn't always easy. There were days when I'd leave work and wonder if this was right for me. The exhaustion I felt leaving there day after day overwhelmed me at times. Tedious hours of planning. Stacks of papers to grade. Never ending arguments and tattles. I was often questioning myself as well. “Am I good for these kids? Am I a good teacher?”
I know, with the year coming to an end, that it was worth it all. My first year is in the past! On to a long, and successful career. I know I am in the right place at this very moment.
Are you in the right place at this very moment?
Just food for thought.
