10 Parenting Tips For Raising Unspoiled, Thankful Kids

By Dr. Sheryl Ziegler

 Read the original article here

In Other Words: How Not To Raise A Spoiled Brat (You're Welcome)

In my private practice I often see affluent families struggling with wanting to raise "grateful and unspoiled children" despite being wealthy, going on lavish vacations, having beautiful homes and owning the latest gadgets, toys and luxury cars. They ask me if it is really possible and my answer is "Yes, but you are going to have to work hard at it." I call it intentional parenting and it takes a lot of discipline to pull it off.
So, here is my list of the top 10 things around which you and your support group need to have clarity and consistent follow through in order to raise unspoiled children.
And at the end of the day, if you have a spoiled child—one who relentlessly nags, cries and throws a huge fit when they do not get what they want—you only have yourself to blame! Stop giving in and start applying most if not all of these values and approaches. Start being a great example. You will have greater enjoyment in being a parent, your child will be happier and better adjusted and there will be greater peace and love in your home. And that is something money cannot buy.

1. Say no...often. 

Practice delayed gratification and simply not always giving your children what they want, even if you can easily afford it.

2. Expect gratitude.

Go beyond teaching your child to say please and thank you. Also teach them eye contact, a proper hand shake, affection and appreciation for the kind and generous things that are said and given to them. If this does not happen, have them return the gift (either to the person or to you for safe keeping) and explain that they aren't yet ready to receive such a gift.

3. Practice altruism yourself.

Donate clothes and toys to those in need (not just to your neighbors when it's easy and they have younger children!) and have your kids be a part of that process. Do this regularly as a family and sort through, package and deliver the goods together so the kids really see where their things are going. Do this often and not just around the holidays.

4. Be mindful of the company you keep. 

If you only hang around other affluent families who are not raising their kids with intention, you may be surrounding yourself with those who will not help out with what you are trying to accomplish. Be sure family or friends you are spending significant time with have similar values to yours, otherwise you are going to feel defeated after a while.

5. Write thank you cards. 

Yes, handwritten on paper with a pen! Kids these days generally have shorter attention spans, are easily distracted and aren't taught to take careful time and attention to express their appreciation. This simple yet important act can go a long way as a skill to teach expression of feelings and thoughtfulness.

6. Don't catch every fall.

Practice natural consequences from an early age — share some of your own experiences and teach them lessons such as "life is not fair." In addition, don't over-protect them from disappointments. You have to really understand and believe that failing and falling is a part successful childhood development.

7. Resist the urge to buy multiples of things.

Just because you can doesn't mean that you should! Don't buy four American Girl Dolls—buy just one and have your child love and appreciate what they have.

8.Talk to their grandparents and explain your intentions to them.

Share with them your desires to have respectful, appreciative, kind and responsible children and the ways in which you are going to achieve that goal. You will need their help in doing this if they are like most grandparents who want to spoil their grandkids! Ask them to spoil them with love, time, affection and attention—not toys, treats and money.

9. Teach them the value of money.

Have your child manage their money through saving, giving to charity/others and then spending.  If you do this from an early age you are truly setting a foundation of responsible wealth management.

10. Share your story.

Last but not least, you should tell your kids the legacy of your family's fortune. When I say wealth or fortune, that is all relative. If you come from significant wealth tell the story of how that was earned and created. If you are self-made, tell that story too—just don't forget that "giving your kids everything that you didn't have" is not always a good thing. There is probably a lot that you learned along the way by stumbling to make you the person you are today.

 

Let go and see the world from time-to-time

Swimming with the Galapagos Sea Lions 

From the blog Creative with Kids 

You never know the words that  your kids will carry with them the rest of their lives.
May these words  inspire you to turn to your child and say something like:

1. You are loved
2. You make me smile
3. I think about you when we’re apart.
4. My world is better with you in it.
5. I will do my best to keep you safe.
6. Sometimes I will say no.
7. I have faith in you.
8. I know you can handle it.
9. You are creative.
10. Trust your instincts.
11. Your ideas are worthwhile.
12. You are capable.
13. You are deserving.
14. You are strong.
15. You can say no.
16. Your choices matter.
17. You make a difference.
18. Your words are powerful.
19. Your actions are powerful.
20. Your emotions may be powerful.
21. And you can still choose your actions.
22. You are more than your emotions.
23. You are a good friend.
24. You are kind.
25. You don’t have to like what someone is saying in order to treat them with respect.
26. Someone else’s poor behavior is not an excuse for your own.
27. You are imperfect.
28. So am I.
29. You can change your mind.
30. You can learn from your mistakes.
31. You can ask for help.
32. You are learning.
33. You are growing.
34. Growing is hard work.
35. I believe you.
36. I believe in you.
37. You are valuable.
38. You are interesting.
39. You are beautiful.
40. When you make a mistake you are still beautiful.
41. Your body is your own.
42. You have say over your body.
43. You are important.
44. Your ideas matter.
45. You are able to do work that matters.
46. I see you working and learning every day.
47. You make a difference in my life.
48. I am curious what you think.
49. How did you do that?
50. Your ideas are interesting.
51. You’ve made me think of things in a completely new way.
52. I’m excited to see what you do.
53. Thanks for helping me.
54. Thank you for contributing to our family.
55. I enjoy your company.
56. It’s fun to do things with you.
57. I’m glad you’re here.
58. I’m happy to talk with you.
59. I’m ready to listen.
60. I’m listening.
61. I’m proud of you.
62. I’m grateful you’re in my life.
63. You make me smile.
64. I love you.

Time Lapse

This is beautiful, and a really good idea! I have to remember to try this one day.

Julia Roberts, an astonishingly beautiful actress, reminds us all how important and beautiful Mother Nature really is. I knew I always like her!

and here we have a very similar ad voiced by Harrison Ford! What I love is that people who are well known have a much bigger audience and for them to support our Earth means that thousands more will listen. It's just great.

Coincidental factoids make for a really interesting read!

OK so Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy are known as two really great presidents. However, there is a connection between the two even I didn't catch on to! And I've studies History for years!

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.

John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.

John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.

Both wives lost a child while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.

Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.

Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.

Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.

Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.

Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
  
Both assassins were known by their three names.

Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named "Ford."

Kennedy was shot in a car called "Lincoln" made by "Ford."

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the "kicker":

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.

A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

AND...................:

Lincoln was shot in a theater and the assassin ran to a warehouse...

Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and the assassin ran to a theater...
I saw this had to share just in case anyone did not know.

101 Things I Will Teach My Daughter- credit to Sierra Vandervort

1. The most beautiful thing you can do is smile.
2. Embrace whatever genre of music you enjoy listening to. Don't let anyone tell you it's "not music."
3. But just know there will never be a better song than "In the Air Tonight" by Phil Collins.
4. It's OK to think another woman is beautiful.
5. Don't be catty to other women. You'll need them when we all overthrow the world together.
6. Don't let any man convince you that he is powerful enough to change you.
7. Even if he bought you dinner, you owe him nothing.
8. The amount of pride you feel when you look good in your bikini for 20 minutes is far less than the happiness Taco Bell can bring you. I promise.
9. Develop a lust to see the world around you.
10. It's OK if you don't want to play princess or put on makeup.
11. But it's OK if you do, too.
12. But at least try rugby once for me.
13. Make sure your life is actually as fun as your Instagram profile makes it out to be.
14. Don't smile if you don't mean it.
15. You really don't need another girl to go to the bathroom with you.
16. Be blind to gender, race, sexuality and religious beliefs.
17. People are people.
18. There are few things in life that candles and Fleetwood Mac can't fix.
19. Don't let any man whistle at you on the street and get away with it.
20. If you can't wear sweatpants and be beer bloated around them, they aren't really your friends.
21. Find friends who are OK with holding your hair back.
22. Be there to hold theirs, too.
23. Never let a location be your excuse.
24. You can be the best from wherever you are.
25. Develop a voice, and make it loud.
26. Your success is not my success. It's yours and yours alone.
27. Even if you're tall, wear the damn heels.
28. I would really like it if you read Jane Eyre.
29. But if you end up liking Twilight, that's cool too.
30. No 50 Shades of Grey, though.
31. That sh*t is terrible.
32. Please, watch Friends.
33. At least consider joining the Peace Corps.
34. Go antique shopping.
35. Keep the ticket stubs.
36. Always wash your face before you go to bed.
37. You don't need to bathe yourself in perfume.
38. Go swimming with your clothes on.
39. Go swimming with no clothes on.
40. A juice cleanse is never, and never will be, a good idea.
41. You're obligated to watch The Lion King with me at least five times in your life.
42. Believe in guardian angels.
43. Make wishes on fallen eyelashes.
44. Be passionate.
45. Be overly passionate.
46. Be so passionate that people think you might be a little insane.
47. Feminists aren't scary.
48. Learn to play the game Spoons.
49. And Euchre.
50. Don't stretch yourself too thin.
51. Never shrink yourself.
52. Don't let anyone tell you it's a phase if you don't think it is.
53. Your sexuality does not define your morality.
54. Go to a music festival at least once.
55. Don't dress the way fashion editors tell you to dress, dress the way they dress.
56. If your job or your success emasculates him, he isn't worth it.
57. Find a man who has more balls than you do.
58. Or woman.
59. And that's OK.
60. If a guy talks to you in clichés, run.
61. Your value does not come from your appearance, age or size.
62. It never will.
63. High school is not the best time of your life.
64. College is.
65. The question "What are you thinking?" will work wonders.
66. Dance like a maniac in your room with your headphones in.
67. I won't laugh.
68. Meet someone who makes you laugh so hard you pee.
69. Hold onto them forever.
70. Go barefoot.
71. Don't be naïve.
72. Sometimes being classy is overrated.
73. Keep your head up.
74. Believe in magic.
75. Don't regret the times you feel sad. How else will you appreciate the times you feel good?
76. Everything in moderation.
77. Even moderation.
78. Coffee is good for your soul.
79. Be unapologetically honest.
80. Connect to music on a level deeper than even you understand.
81. Wake up early.
82. Find a good gay best friend.
83. He'll let you sleep in his bed and borrow his eyeliner.
84. Don't let anyone push you around.
85. Surround yourself with colorful, beautiful people.
86. Remember that not everyone will think like you.
87. Never pass up an experience in favor of sleep.
88. The painful truth is always easier than a messy lie.
89. Drink champagne and dance on the table.
90. Make a Bucket List.
91. Make a Nectar List.
92. Always say "I love you" before you leave.
93. Never ignore what's in front of you in favor of taking a photograph.
94. Learn how to successfully get to the front row of concerts.
95. Go camping without worrying about how dirty your hair will get.
96. Learn to love the way you laugh.
97. Laugh often.
98. Be cheesy.
99. When you feel a good moment, absorb it.
100. Find beauty in everything.
101. Don't let fear hold you back from anything.
This post originally appeared on Day dreaming in ink.
Original Post 

Food for Thought